57、婚姻之爱具有无限多样性，没有哪两个人的婚姻之爱是一样的。诚然，它在很多人身上看似相同，但这只是基于身体的判断，这种判断因着稠密和迟钝而不会使人轻易作出区分。基于身体的判断是指心智基于外在感官作出的判断。但在那些基于灵的判断看问题的人面前，差别是显而易见的；而在那些将这种判断的视野提升得更高的人面前，更是一目了然，因为其判断的视野退离了感官，升入更强的光中。这些人能以理解力信服、进而看出，没有哪两个人的婚姻之爱是相同的。即便如此，若不先了解婚姻之爱在其真正本质和完整状态方面的性质，因而了解当它连同生命被神植入人内时的性质，没有人能在理解力的光明中看到这爱的无限多样性，哪怕理解力得到提升。除非知道它最完美的状态，否则根本无法探究它的差别。因为在这种情况下，缺乏一个固定点作为起始点，使得这些区分能由此被推论出来，或缺乏一个可以说它们能对准的参照点，以表明这些区分是正确作出的，还是错误作出的。这就是为何我们在此开始描述婚姻之爱的真正本质，并且由于当这爱连同生命被神注入人内时，它就在这本质中，所以我们着手描述它的原始状态。在此状态中的爱情才真正属于婚姻，故本章的标题是“真正的婚姻之爱”。对它的描述将按以下顺序展开：
⑴真婚姻之爱的确存在，但如今极其罕见，以致人们不知道它的性质，甚至几乎不知道它的存在。
⑵这爱源于良善与真理之间的婚姻。
⑶这爱和主与教会的婚姻之间存在对应关系。
⑷就其起源和对应而言，这爱更为属天、属灵、神圣、纯粹和洁净，远胜从主存在于天上天使或教会成员中的其它任何爱。
⑸这爱也是一切属天、属灵之爱，及由此而来的一切属世之爱的根基。
⑹而且，一切欢喜和一切快乐，从初至末，皆汇集于这爱。
⑺只有那些靠近主、热爱教会真理、行出教会所教导的良善之人才能获得并享有这爱。
⑻在生活于黄金、白银和青铜时代的古人当中，这爱是爱的最高形式，但此后，它逐渐消失了。
现逐一解读上述要点。
57、婚姻之爱有好多不同的形式，每个人的情况都不相同。尽管看上去好多都是一样的，但这只是对于肉体来说是这样的。凭肉体来判断我们很难看到婚姻之爱中的多样性。因为肉体是不够敏锐的。这里所说的用肉体来判断是指根据感官大脑所做的判断。
根据精神来判断的人会看到完全不同的情景。对于那些能排除感官而凭借更高层的光线来判断的人，他们看得更清楚。这些人才能确信婚姻之爱在每个人的身上都是不同的。
但是没有人能够知道各种各样的婚姻之爱，除非他知道婚姻之爱的实质和完美境界。知道婚姻之爱与生命一样是主赋予人类的。除非知道这种最完美的境界，否则是无法知道婚姻之爱的多样性的。
因此在这一章我们继续描述一下婚姻之爱的本质。因为它是与生命一起由上帝赋予人类的。我们谈一下它在最初是什么样子的。因为在最初的阶段婚姻之爱是真正的婚姻，我们称这一章为“真正的婚姻之爱。”
我们按照以下几条来谈一下婚姻之爱。
（1）曾经有一种婚姻之爱，如今的人们很少知道有它的存在。
（2）这种爱来源于善和真理的结合。
（3）这种爱和主与教会的结合之间有对应关系。
（4）从它的起源和对应关系上讲，这种爱是有灵性的，神圣的，纯洁干净的。胜过来自于主的存在于天使中的爱和在教会里的人的爱。
（5）它是所有灵性的爱，神圣的爱及自然的爱的基础。
（6）在这种爱中存在着所有的快乐和愉悦。
（7）只有那些走向主，热爱教会的真理并按其所教行事的人才能得到它，下面继续阐述以上几点：
57. IV. TRULY CONJUGIAL LOVE
There are countless varieties of conjugial love; no one has exactly the same conjugial love as another. It may indeed seem similar in many people, but this is the result of applying bodily judgment, and this judgment does not allow one readily to make distinctions, being gross and dull. Bodily judgment means mental judgment which relies on the outward senses. But those whose sight comes from the judgment of the spirit can see the differences, and the more clearly if people are able to lift this power of judgment to a higher level, something which can be done by withdrawing it from the senses and raising it into a higher light. Those who reach this level are finally able to confirm intellectually and thus see that no one has exactly the same conjugial love as another.
Still no one can see the countless varieties of this love, however enlightened and raised his intellect may be, unless he first knows what that love is like in its essence and integrity; what it was like, in fact, when conferred on man by God together with life. Without knowing the most perfect state it then had, it is vain to expect any amount of research to reveal its distinctions. For there would not then be any fixed point from which distinctions could be seen to depart, or target at which they could be said to aim, so as to show whether they were truly or fallaciously made. This is why we here begin with a description of conjugial love in its true essence; and since it was in this state when it was introduced by God into man together with life, we begin by describing its primeval state. Because at that stage it was truly conjugial, this section is headed 'Truly Conjugial Love.' The description will proceed in the following order.
(i) Truly conjugial love exists, but is so rare that today its nature is unknown and almost its very existence.
(ii) This love arises from the marriage of good and truth.
(iii) This love stands by correspondence for the marriage of the Lord with the church.
(iv) This love, having regard to its origin and correspondence, is more celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and clean than any other love the Lord confers on angels in heaven or people in the church.
(v) This love is also the foundation of all celestial and spiritual loves, and thus of all natural ones.
(vi) All joys and all delights, from first to last, have been conferred on this love.
(vii) The only people who can acquire and enjoy that love are those who approach the Lord, loving the truths the church teaches and doing the good deeds it prescribes.
(viii) This was the highest form of love among the people of antiquity, who lived in the Golden, Silver and Copper Ages, but after this it gradually came to an end.
There now follows an explanation of these propositions.
57. TRULY CONJUGIAL LOVE
Conjugial love is unlimited in its variety. It is not the same in one person as it is in another. It appears, indeed, as if it were the same in many cases, but that is how it appears to a judgment of the body, and a person scarcely sees the diversities in such things on the basis of a judgment like that, because it is dense and obtuse. By a judgment of the body we mean a judgment of the mind on the basis of its external senses.
People who see as a result of a judgment of the spirit, however, to them the differences appear, and they appear even more clearly to those who can raise the sight of this judgment still higher, by withdrawing this sight from the senses and elevating it into a higher light. These people are finally able to convince themselves with the understanding and thus see that conjugial love is not the same in one person as it is in another.
But even so, no one can see the endless varieties of this love in any light of the understanding, even if elevated, unless he first knows what that love is like in its true essence and perfect state, thus what it was like when, together with life, it was bestowed on mankind by God. Unless this state of it is known, which was most perfect, its diversities can by no means be discovered by any method of inquiry. For there is in that case no fixed point from which, as a point of origin, the diversities may be traced and to which, as a point of reference, they may be related so as to appear accurately and not deceptively.
For this reason, we proceed in this chapter to describe that love in its true essence. And since that love existed in its true essence when, together with life, it was infused into mankind by God, we proceed to describe it as it was in its original state. Moreover, because in that state conjugial love was truly conjugial, we title this chapter, "Truly Conjugial Love."
Description of this love, however, will be developed according to the following outline:
1. There is a truly conjugial love, which today is so rare that people do not know what it is like, and scarcely that it exists.
2. This love originates from the marriage between good and truth.
3. There is a correspondence between this love and the marriage of the Lord and the church.
4. Regarded from its origin and correspondence, this love is celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and clean, more so than any other love which exists from the Lord in angels of heaven or people of the church.
5. It is also the fundamental love of all celestial and spiritual loves, and consequently of natural loves.
6. Moreover, into this love have been gathered all joys and all delights, from the first to the last of them.
7. But no others come into this love and no others can be in it but those who go to the Lord and love the truths of the church and do the good things it teaches.
8. This love was the greatest of loves among the ancients who lived in the golden, silver and copper ages, but after that it gradually disappeared.
Development of these points now follows.
57. Chapter 4. The Real Love in Marriage
The love in marriage comes in endless variety. It is not the same for one person as for another. It does seem the same for everyone, but that is only if your body is the judge of it. The body's judgment does not show anyone the whole picture, because it is heavy and dull. Bodily judgment is a mental judgment based on the five senses.
But to people who approach it with spiritual judgment, the differences stand out. They stand out the more noticeably the higher these people lift the sight of this spiritual judgment by taking their eyes off the senses and looking up where the light is better. Eventually they can settle the question intellectually - and then they see that the love in marriage is not the same for one person as for another.
But no one at all - not even the highly intellectual - can see the endless varieties of this love with any intellectual clarity without first knowing what its very essence and purity is like - or what it was like when the Lord put it and life into man together.
Without knowing this state of it, which was most perfect, any investigation of its differences is useless, because there is no fixed point that the differences come from, like warp threads, and that they depend on for alignment so as not to be seen deceptively, but clearly.
This is the reason I undertake to describe that love in its true essentials here (it was in these essentials when the Lord infused it into man together with life) and to describe it as it was in its primeval state. This chapter is called "The Real Love in Marriage" because it was the real love in marriage when in that state. This description of it comes in this order:
1. There is a real married love that is so rare today that people do not know what it is, and they hardly even know it exists.
2. The origin of this love is a marriage of good and truth.
3. This love corresponds to the marriage of the Lord and the church.
4. In view of its origin and correspondence, this love is heavenly, spiritual, holy, pure, and clean beyond every other love that angels of heaven or people on earth have from the Lord.
5. It is also the basic love of all heavenly, spiritual and, therefore, earthly loves.
6. And all joys and delights, from first to last, are gathered up in this love.
7. But only those who approach the Lord, love the truths of the church, and do its good services, enter this love and can experience it.
8. This love was the love of loves among the ancient people who lived in the Golden, Silver, and Copper ages, but afterwards it gradually went away.
Here is the explanation of these topics:
57. LOVE TRULY CONJUGIAL
Conjugial love is of infinite variety, not being the same with one person as with another. With many it does indeed appear to be the same, but it appears so only before the judgment of the body, and from this judgment, seeing that it is gross and dull, man has little discernment of such things. By the judgment of the body is meant the judgment of the mind from the external senses. Before those who see from the judgment of the spirit, the differences are apparent; and more distinctly apparent before those who can elevate the sight of this judgment still higher, which is done by its withdrawal from the senses and its exaltation into higher light. Such men can then confirm themselves by the understanding and so can see that conjugial love is not the same with one person as with another. Yet no one can see the infinite varieties of that love in any light of the understanding, even though elevated, unless he first know the nature of the love itself in its essence and integrity; thus its nature when together with life it was implanted in man by God. Unless its state then be known, a state which was most perfect, its differences cannot be discovered by any inquiry, there being no stable point from which, as a commencement, those differences can be deduced, and to which, by keeping it in view, they can refer themselves and so be seen truly and not fallaciously. This is the reason why we have set out to describe this love in its genuine essence; and, since it was in this essence when together with life it was infused into man by God, to describe it as it was in its primeval state. In this state it was truly conjugial, and therefore this chapter is entitled LOVE TRULY CONJUGIAL. The description shall be given in the following order:
I. That there is a love truly conjugial, which is so rare at this day that it is not known what it is and scarcely that it is.
II. That the origin of this love is from the marriage of good and truth.
III. That the correspondence of this love is with the marriage of the Lord and the Church.
IV. That, regarded from its origin and correspondence, this love is celestial, spiritual, holy, pure, and clean, above every love which is from the Lord with the angels of heaven and the men of the Church.
V. That it is also the fundamental love of all celestial and spiritual loves, and thence of all natural loves.
VI. And that into this love are gathered all joys and delights from their first to their last.
VII. But that no others come into this love and can be in it save those who approach the Lord, love the truths of the Church and do its goods.
VIII. That this love was the love of loves with the ancients who lived in the Golden, Silver, and Copper Ages, but that afterwards it gradually departed.
The explanation of these points now follows:
57. III. TRUE MARITAL LOVE
Marital love has infinite variety; it is not the same with any two persons. It seems the same, indeed, with a number, but it so appears only to the bodily judgment, a coarse and dull judgment, from which one discerns little about such matters. (By bodily judgment is meant judgment of the mind by the external senses.) But differences appear to those who see from the spirit's judgment, and the more distinctly as they raise the vision of this judgment higher, by withdrawing the outlook from the senses and elevating it into higher light. These can at length confirm themselves in the comprehension and insight that marital love is not the same in any two persons. Still, no one can see its infinite varieties in any light of the understanding, however elevated, unless first he knows what the nature of this love is in its essence and integrity, thus what it was like when, together with life, it was imparted to man by God. Unless this, its first and most perfect state, is known, in vain are its differences to be discovered by any scrutiny. For there is then no fixed point from which, as a beginning, the differences can be determined, and to which, as to a criterion, they can be referred so as to appear truly and not misleadingly. We therefore proceed now to describe this love in its genuine essence; and because it had this essence when together with life it was infused in man by God, to describe it as it was in its first state. In that state it was true marital love, and the present chapter is therefore entitled, "True Marital Love." We proceed with the description in this order:
I. There is a true marital love which is so rare today that its character is not known, and hardly that it exists.
II. The origin of this love is in the marriage of good and truth.
III. There is a correspondence between this love and the marriage of the Lord and the Church.
IV. In view of its origin and correspondence, this love is celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and clean above every love which the angels of heaven or men of the Church have from the Lord.
V. It is also the fundamental love among all celestial and spiritual loves and among natural loves thence.
VI. Into this love are gathered all joys and delights from first to last.
VII. Only those come into this love, however, or can be in it, who approach the Lord, and love the truths and do the goods of the Church.
VIII. This love was the love of loves with the ancients who lived in the golden, silver and copper ages, but afterwards it gradually declined.
Explanation of these propositions follows.
57. ON LOVE TRULY CONJUGIAL.
Conjugial love is of infinite variety. It is not alike in one as in any other. It appears indeed as if it were alike with many, but it appears so only before the judgment of the body, and by that judgment man has little discernment of such things, because it is gross and dull. By the judgment of the body is meant the judgment of the mind from the external senses. But to those who see from the judgment of the spirit the differences appear; and more distinctly before them who can more highly elevate the sight of this judgment, which is done by withdrawing it from the senses and raising it into higher light. They can finally confirm themselves by the understanding, and thus see that conjugial love is not alike in one as in another. And yet no one can see the infinite varieties of that love in any light of the understanding, though elevated, unless he first knows what that love is in its very essence and integrity; that is to say, what it was when together with life it was implanted in man by God. Unless this state which was most perfect is known, in vain can its distinctions be disclosed by any inquiry, because there is no settled point as a beginning whence distinctions may be deduced, or to which they may be referred as a criterion, and so appear truly and without fallacy. This is the reason why we here proceed to describe that love in its genuine essence and - because it was in this when together with life it was infused into man by God - to describe it in its primeval state. And as in this state it was truly conjugial this chapter is inscribed, On Love Truly Conjugial. The description of it shall be given in the following order:
(1) That there is love truly conjugial; which is so rare at the present day that its quality is not known, and scarcely that it exists.
(2) That the origin of this love is from the marriage of good and truth.
(3) That the correspondence of this love is with the marriage of the Lord and the church.
(4) That by virtue of its origin and its correspondence this love is celestial, spiritual, holy, pure, and clean, beyond any love from the Lord which exists with the angels of heaven and with the men of the church.
(5) That it is also the fundamental love of all loves, celestial and spiritual, and thence of all natural loves.
(6) That into this love are gathered all joys and all delights from first to last.
(7) That none come into this love, and can be in it, but those who come to the Lord and love the truths and do the goods of the church.
(8) That this love was the love of loves with the ancients who lived in the golden, silver, and copper ages; but afterwards it successively ceased.
The explanation of these subjects now follows.
57. DE AMORE VERE CONJUGIALI
Est Amor conjugialis infinitae varietatis; non datur similis apud unum qualis est apud alterum; apparet quidem sicut similis apud multos, sed ita apparet coram judicio corporis, et homo ex hoc judicio parum discernit talia, quia est crassum et hebes; per judicium corporis intelligitur judicium mentis ex sensibus externis: at coram illis, qui ex judicio spiritus vident, apparent discrimina, et distinctius coram illis, qui visum hujus judicii possunt altius elevare, quod fit per abductionem ejus a sensibus, et exaltationem ejus in lucem superiorem; hi tandem possunt confirmare se intellectu, et sic videre, quod Amor conjugialis non detur similis apud unum, qualis est apud alterum. At usque nemo potest infinitas varietates hujus Amoris in aliqua luce intellectus etiam elevati videre, nisi primum sciat, qualis ille Amor est in ipsa sua essentia et integritate, ita qualis fuit, quando una cum vita a Deo inditus est homini; nisi hic ejus status, qui fuit perfectissimus, noscatur, frustra aliqua inquisitione discrimina ejus possunt detegi; non enim est aliquod stabile punctum, ex quo ut exordio discrimina deducantur, et ad quod sicut collimando, illa se referant, et sic vere et non fallaciter appareant. Haec causa est, quod hic ingrediamur describere Amorem illum in sua genuina essentia; et quia in hac fuit ille, quando una cum vita a Deo infusus est homini, describere illum qualis fuit in primaevo suo statu; et quia in hoc statu fuit ille vere conjugialis, inscribitur hic Paragraphus, de Amore vere Conjugiali: at haec illius descriptio fiet in hoc ordine.
I: Quod detur Amor vere conjugialis, qui hodie tam rarus est, ut non sciatur qualis est, et vix quod sit.
II: Quod illius Amoris origo sit ex Conjugio boni et veri.
III: Quod illius Amoris correspondentia sit cum Conjugio Domini et Ecclesiae.
IV: Quod ille Amor ex sua origine et ex sua correspondentia spectatus sit coelestis, spiritualis, sanctus, purus et mundus prae omni amore, qui a Domino est apud angelos coeli, et apud homines Ecclesiae.
V: Quod etiam sit Amor fundamentalis omnium amorum coelestium et spiritualium, et inde naturalium.
VI: Quodque in illum amorem collata sint omnia gaudia et omnes delitiae a primis ad ultima.
VII: Sed quod non alii in illum amorem veniant, et in illo esse possint, quam qui adeunt Dominum, ac vera Ecclesiae amant, et bona ejus faciunt.
VIII: Quod hic Amor fuerit amor amorum apud Antiquos, qui in Saeculo aureo, argenteo et cupreo vixerant, sed quod postea successive facesserit. Explicatio horum nunc sequitur.