1911. When I had finally become accustomed to the idea that I did not think anything on my own, this was almost a joyful thought to me, for then I could reflect on whatever was brought into my thoughts, and know that I myself was free of evil thoughts.
In fact, I was even allowed to find out who the spirits were, and where they were, who were injecting the evil thoughts, with whom I very often spoke about these matters. I was allowed to learn from whom, and whence, even the least detail of thought came. These reflections were therefore pleasant to me.
1911. When at length I had become accustomed to the fact of my inability to think anything of myself, then I found a certain pleasure in it, for I could thus reflect upon the things that were introduced into my thoughts [knowing all the while] that I was free from the blame of evil thoughts; yea, it was given me to know who were the particular spirits, and where they were, that injected these evil thoughts, and with whom I have often conversed upon these very points; yea, it was given me to know even the minutiae of thought, from whom and whence, and thus those reflections were pleasant.
1911. Cum tandem assuefactus iis {a}, quod nihil a me cogitarem, tunc mihi erat quasi jucundum, nam sic reflectere potui super ea, quae inferebantur in cogitationes, et quod ego liber essem a malis cogitationibus, imo scire dabatur quinam spiritus, et ubinam essent, qui cogitationes malas inferrent, cum quibus quam 1
saepe de iis loquutus; imo etiam pusillum cogitationis noscere mihi dabatur, a quibus, et unde, sic reflexiones istae mihi jucundae erant.
Footnotes:
1. This is how it appears in J.F.I. Tafel's edition; the Manuscript has quae