290、⒆当能力在男人里面停止时，若妻子依旧展示善意，一种类似婚姻友谊的友谊有可能随着他们逐渐老去而产生。夫妻心智分离的主要因素是，当男人丧失能力后，妻子这一方缺乏善意，因而缺乏爱。因为正如热与热相通，冷同样与冷相通。从理性和经验明显可知，夫妻无论哪一方失去爱，都会使友谊终止，并且只要不害怕家产受到损失，有可能连善意都没有了。因此，如果男人默默自责，而妻子仍一如继往地向他展示贞洁的善意，那么夫妻之间可能会产生一种友谊，这种友谊看似模仿婚姻之爱的爱。经验表明，老年夫妻之间就可能存在这种貌似出于婚姻之爱的友谊，这种友谊是基于夫妻共同生活和经营，并以一种宁静、安全、充满爱和礼貌的方式享受彼此陪伴。
290、（19）当丈夫性无能以后，若妻子们与其在一起，他们之间就会随年龄的增长产生一种与婚姻之爱相似的友谊。
造成夫妇在精神上相互分离的首要原因是当丈夫的性能力丧失后，妻子对其好感渐渐减弱。正如热情可以相互影响一样，冷漠也会相互影响。在性活动减少的同时，他们的友谊也在减少，这一点是不难看到的。
为了避免损害家庭，男人将原因归于自身，女人还保持着对丈夫的真诚的爱。这种情况下，在这种夫妇中就会产生与婚姻之爱相信的友谊。
经验证明在年长的夫妇间会有这种与婚姻之爱相似的友谊，他们间有稳定的，融洽的关系，相互间彼此尊敬。
290. (xix) If a wife does not cease to show good will, so long as her husband remains capable, there may be friendship which resembles that of marriage and which lasts until they grow old.
The leading reason for the separation of a couple's minds is the loss of good will, and so love, on the wife's part, when the man suffers from a loss of capability. For just as heat in both partners is mutually shared, so is coldness. Reason and experience both establish that the loss of love on the part of either partner puts an end to friendship, and so long as there is no fear that family property at home will suffer, good will too may be lost. If therefore the man thinks to himself that he is to blame, and the wife still continues to show chaste good will towards him, this may lead to a friendship which, being between married partners, looks like a love imitating conjugial love. Experience shows that a friendship like that of this love may exist between elderly couples, as a result of their living and working together, and enjoying each other's company in a calm, confident, loving and fully civilised way.
290. 19. If favor does not cease on the wife's part when ability ceases in the man, a friendship resembling a conjugial one may develop as they grow older. Of the reasons between married partners for a separation of their spirits, a primary one is a dwindling of favor on the part of the wife as ability ceases in the man, so that they no longer make love. For just as states of warmth communicate with each other, so do states of coldness. It then comes to pass that, with the waning of lovemaking on the part of each, their friendship ceases, and if they do not fear the ruination of their private life in the home, also any feeling of favor. That this happens is plain from both reason and experience.
If therefore to avoid this the man quietly attributes the cause to himself, and the wife still perseveres in a chaste attitude of favor toward him, a new friendship may develop on that account, which, being between married partners, appears as something resembling conjugial love.
That a friendship resembling one of conjugial love is possible between older married partners is attested by experience, from their tranquil, secure, and amiable associations, interactions and relations with each other, full of mutual courtesy.
290. 19. If the wife is still thoughtful to the man when he loses his potency, a friendship resembling the friendship of marriage may spring up as they grow old. One of the main reasons why the minds of married partners drift apart is that the wife's favorable attitude toward the man fades away as his potency wanes and his love decreases, because coldness is reciprocal just as warmth is. Without love, they both lose their friendship and even their consideration for each other, unless they are afraid of the danger to their family life. This is clear from reason and experience. Then, if the man quietly takes the responsibility and the wife stays chastely considerate of him, a friendship can emerge from it that will closely resemble married love, because it exists between married partners.
Experience shows that this kind of friendship can come to an aged couple from the peace, security, good nature, and great kindness of their close relationship in living together and companionship.
290. XIX. THAT WHEN THE PARTNERS GROW OLD, IF FAVOR DOES NOT CEASE WITH THE WIFE WHEN ABILITY CEASES WITH THE MAN, THERE MAY ARISE A FRIENDSHIP EMULOUS OF CONJUGIAL FRIENDSHIP. The primary cause of the separation of minds between married partners is the lack of favor with the wife when ability and hence love ceases with the man; for in like manner as heat communicates with heat, so cold communicates with cold. That from defect of love with both partners friendship ceases, and if the destruction of private life in the home is not feared, also favor, is evident from reason and from experience. If then the man tacitly imputes the cause to himself, and the wife still perseveres in chaste favor towards him, there may result thence a friendship which, being between married partners, seems like love emulating conjugial love. That between aged partners, on the ground of their dwelling together, their dealings, and their comradeship, there is a friendship as though of conjugial love, tranquil, secure, lovely, and full of courtesy, is attested by experience.
290. (xix) If favor does not cease with the wife when ability does with the man, a friendship emulating marital friendship may arise as they grow old. Primary among causes of the separation of minds between partners is diminishing favor and hence diminishing love with the wife, as ability ceases with the man. For cold communicates itself just as warmth does. Reason and experience show that on the failure of love in a partner, friendship ceases, and unless domestic ruin is feared, favor too. If therefore the man quietly assumes the fault, and the wife perseveres in chaste favor toward him, a friendship can result, which, existing between married partners, to all appearance emulates marital love. Experience attests that a friendship seemingly of marital love is possible between aging partners, in the tranquil, serene, affectionate and altogether gentle intercourse and partnership of many in their life together.
290. (19) That if on the part of the wife favor towards the man does not cease when faculty ceases with him, there may spring up a friendship emulating conjugial friendship as they grow old. The chief of the causes of the separation of minds between married partners is decreasing favor on the part of the wife as faculty wanes with the man, and thence decrease of love. For in like manner as states of heat communicate with each other, so also do states of cold. That from failure of love with both of them friendship fails, and, if domestic ruin is not feared, favor also, is evident from reason and from experience. If then the man tacitly imputes to himself the cause, and the wife abides still in chaste favor towards him, there may result thence a friendship which, as it is between married partners, appears like a love emulating conjugial love. That there may be friendship as of that love between aged married partners, is attested by experience as to the tranquility, security, amiability, and abundant comity of their close companionship, intercourse, and consociation.
290. XIX: Quod si apud uxorem non cessat favor, dum facultas apud virum, fieri possit amicitia aemulans conjugialem cum senescunt. Primaria causarum separationis animorum inter conjuges, est favor deficiens apud uxorem, cessante facultate apud virum, et inde amor; nam similiter sicut calores communicant inter se, etiam frigora: quod ex defectu amoris apud utrumque, cesset amicitia, et si pernicies rei familiaris in domo non timetur, etiam favor, a ratione et ab experientia constat. Si itaque vir tacite sibi imputat causam, et usque uxor in casto favore erga illum perseverat, potest inde resultare amicitia, quae quia est inter conjuges, apparet sicut amor aemulans conjugialem. Quod amicitia tanquam illius amoris detur inter conjuges senes, ex illorum contuberniis, commerciis, et consortiis tranquillis, securis, amabilibus, et comitate plenis, experientia testatur.