381、在一些人当中确实有婚姻之爱的样子。然而，除非他们在良善和真理的爱中，否则，就没有婚姻之爱，只是一种出于诸多原因、看上去像婚姻之爱的爱，也就是说，他们可以在家里被伺候，感到安全、安宁或闲暇，在生病或年老时得到照顾，或者共同照顾心爱的孩子。有些人受到束缚是因为惧怕配偶，或害怕丧失名誉，或其它恶果，有些人则是受到控制欲的束缚。此外，在这些配偶中，婚姻之爱会有所不同：一方或多或少，另一方很少或没有，因为这种差异，他们之间的爱对一方可能是天堂，对另一方却可能是地狱。
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381. 有些人里面有一种婚姻之爱的形像. 然而, 除非他们专注于对良善与真理的爱, 否则, 这不是婚姻之爱, 只是一种出于种种因素而看似婚姻之爱的爱, 如: 他们想在家里被伺候, 获得安全感, 得到安宁或悠闲; 患病或年老时有人照顾; 照料他们所爱的孩子. 有些人受到制约是因为惧怕对方, 或害怕丧失名声, 或其它不好的后果; 有些人则受到控制欲的束缚. 此外, 婚姻之爱在配偶双方里面也可能不同, 一方的爱可能多点, 而另一方的爱可能少点, 甚至没有. 由于这种不同, 故对一方来说可能是天堂, 而对另一方来说却可能是地狱.
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381. 有的人看似活在婚愛之中, 但是他們若非專注於對良善與真理的熱愛, 那愛就不是婚愛, 不過因若干因素而看似婚愛罷了。比如為在家中得到伺候, 為獲得安全感, 為相安無事, 為在病老時有人照顧, 為撫養所愛的孩子, 或因懼怕對方, 因害怕喪失名聲, 因肉體的欲望, 等等。
婚愛對於配偶雙方也可能不同, 可能一人愛多, 一人愛少, 甚至沒有。愛既有不同, 那麼對於一人可能是天國, 對於另一人卻可能是地獄。
381. There is a kind of image of marriage love in some people, but it is not marriage love unless they are focused on a love of the good and the true. It is a love that looks like marriage love for a number of reasons - we want to be taken care of at home, to feel secure, to be at peace or at leisure, to be taken care of when we are ill or elderly, or [to work together] for the sake of beloved children. In some cases it arises from a fear of the spouse, because of what people will think, or for evil ends; and for some it is lust that causes it.
Marriage love also differs between spouses. It may be more or less in one, little or none in the other; and since it may differ, it may be heaven for one and hell for the other.
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381. To some a likeness of conjugial love is granted. Yet unless they are in the love of good and truth there is no conjugial love, but only a love which from several causes appears like conjugial love, namely, that they may secure good service at home, that they may be free from care, or at peace, or at ease; that they may be cared for in sickness or in old age, or that the children whom they love may be attended to. Some are constrained by fear of the other consort, or by fear of the loss of reputation, or other evil consequences, and some by a controlling lust. Moreover, in the consorts, conjugial love may differ, in one there may be more or less of it, in the other little or none; and because of this difference heaven may be the portion of one and hell the portion of the other.
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381. To some a likeness of marriage love is granted. Yet unless they are in the love of good and truth there is no marriage love, but only a love which from several causes appears like marriage love, namely, that they may secure good service at home; that they may be free from care, or at peace, or at ease; that they may be cared for in sickness or in old age; or that the children whom they love may be attended to. Some are constrained by fear of the other consort, or by fear of the loss of reputation, or other evil consequences, and some by a controlling lust. Moreover, in the two consorts marriage love may differ, in one there may be more or less of it, in the other little or none; and because of this difference heaven may be the portion of one and hell the portion of the other.
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381. Datur quoddam instar amoris conjugialis apud quosdam, sed usque non est amor conjugialis si non in amore boni et veri sunt est amor apparens sicut conjugialis ex pluribus causis, nempe ut serviantur domi, ut in securo sint, vel in tranquillitate, vel in otio, vel ut ministrentur cum non bene valent et senescunt, vel ob curam liberorum quos amant: quibusdam est coactum ex timore pro conjuge, pro fama, pro malis quibusdam lascivum quod inducit. Amor conjugialis etiam differt apud conjuges apud unum potest esse plus ejus aut minus, apud alterum parum aut nihil; et quia differt, uni potest esse caelum, alteri infernum.